By: Marjea C. Santillan
When was the last time you heard the word “VALIDATION”?
From a company? From a school? From an exam? Or someone special?
What is the first thing that comes in your mind when you heard it?
There are a lot of things that will define the word “VALIDATION”. But the question is “What is the significance of this in your life?”
Let us talk about “Validation as person”. That you as a human being, your feelings are valid and your existence matters.
For example, people nowadays are experiencing different emotions that contributed to their everyday lives, most especially when the pandemic COVID 19 virus hit us hard. A lot of companies had been forced to shut down that leaving their employees to become jobless.
Life may be hard but it became harder now. Losing your job feels like losing one of your ace card in playing the game of life. You became worried, you will start to question yourself “why” and “what went wrong”. You might think that life was unfair to you, that life only favors those people who still have their job. Some will say that you just need to move on and that’s just how life is.
Yes you need to move on and you have to, but remember that YOUR EMOTIONS ARE VALID.
YOU are entitled to what you feel. Because as a person your existence and all your pains are VALID.
On the other hand, some people that we call “lucky” for still having their job are also the same people bearing the most pain. Little did we know that they are also wounded emotionally.
They are the people who always strive to do their best in their job, who came to play fair and square, whose only main goal is to have a good job that will secure their future and their family.
While it is expected that not everyone in this world will like you because of our differences. You will still try to present yourself in the best way possible for you to be able to fit in. You will try a hundred times to push yourself to do things for others. Because you thought that’s just how it really works. But what if, an opinion of “someone” marks you negatively as a person? What would you do? How are you going to handle the working environment in a positive way? Or the best question is “Are you still going to continue working in an environment who chose to look down on you because of their own perception about you?”
Are you going to give up and leave crying while cursing everyone because of the anxiety and trauma? Or are you going to give them a good fight and leave with your head held high?
So this is now where it will go, remember how you started. Remember your deepest why. And remember who you really are. Continue doing your best for your job even if it means having no real friends at all. Respect having your own personal space away from all the negativity outside. Choose what is yours and let go of what is not. It is not easy, and never will be. You may cry like a river as long as it hurts. But stop doing everything in your own way to prove them wrong on their perception about you.
People choose to see only what they want to see, hear what they want to hear. You are already tired on your own. So stop trying to change their system that has been working for them for a long time. Their system will only work for those people who choose to follow blindly and exchange their moral beliefs for personal gains.
You can be the change that you wish to see, instead of letting them to change WHO YOU REALLY ARE. Because you know why? At the end of the day, all your hardships will be paid off. When you start to trust God’s perfect timing into your life, you will feel that everything will fall according to HIS plan and not your plan.
It may take a while, months and years maybe. Use those times wisely to improve yourself more, a little longer it may seem but In HIS time, wherein all your pains will become your strength. Your tears will become your happiness. Your failures will become your success. . You will see that it is ALL WORTH IT. You will see that you do not need any VALIDATION from anyone and the only VALIDATION that you need is from yourself. Because you are already VALID. You are more than just an opinion of someone else. Their perception about you does not define you as a person. You don’t need to push yourself into someone’s system just for you to fit in. Remember that everything that makes who you are now are just all part of the ingredients to complete your life’s MAIN DISH. And once completed. You are now ready to serve.